It's hard breaking up but sometimes you just have to do it. I'd rather I didn't have to but I can't go on being strung along. It's not enough to just exist. I think... no, I feel... no, I know that being there does not mean living. You have to breath. You have to laugh. You have to cry. You have to kiss.

I'm tired of waiting and not getting. I'm tired of being used when everyone else seems to be getting rewarded. I know others are fine with an arrangement like this but I know I am worth more. My time is worth more. My life is worth more.

At first, I felt that too many were making such a big deal about it. Then, on Valentine's Day, I realized that it was a big deal. I am not here to be taken for granted. One can only take so much before they realize that the time has come to move on.

So, it is with a sad heart that I say goodbye. Goodbye to Nuke of As The World Turns. It was fun when it started. It was cute when the flirting began. It was engaging even through the drama. But to have a young gay couple avoid any intimate physical contact, when every other couple and whore on the show is enjoying it, is downright patronizing and offensive to me as a gay man. So, as a final offering, I say this, "FUCK YOU As The World Turns!!" Thanks for nothing. Yeah, yeah, ya got a gay couple. Whatever. They're a couple of eunuchs. Albeit, cute eunuchs. Fuck, I think eunuchs even get to kiss. Shit, priests and little boys get to more intimate time than they do.

And guess what? Brothers & Sisters have a gay couple. And their always kissing. And they're equally as cute too. What the fuck is the big deal? Afraid that the daytime audience can't handle such adult matter? Right, they can't handle incest, rape, murder, and adultery either.

Best of luck to the actors who portray the gay characters: Van Hansis and Jake Silbermann. Glad you got a job. Then again, we got one too. A hose job. Later.  ¶ 11:48 PM