Every morning I wake up, I wonder how the hell I am going to do it again. Where am I going to channel my energy from? Will I make it through today's set? I'm referring to teaching step class.

Last night, I subbed a step class for a friend. As I entered the room to teach, I was contemplating how to get out of teaching the class. Should I fake some energy-sapping disease? Can I pretend that the stereo does not work? Should I slap a member and storm out in a fury?

I ended up teaching the class. Afterwards, people came up to me to tell me how much fun they had; even the ones who are regulars in my class. I am not sure why they had fun. The entire time, I thought that I had a scowl on my face that indicated armageddon.

I am not sure what happens during class. I sometimes wonder where any instructor gets their energy from. I wonder who I am channeling because I know for a fact that I am not that happy-go-lucky in real life. I don't know how I can exude joyful energy during class because before class, I have none.

After class, I am definitely wiped out. My body feels like it is about to drop to the floor, curl up into a ball, and hibernate until it can harness some energy from my fat stores. I sometimes wish it would; especially after step class.

And again, today, I wonder where the hell I am going to get the energy to teach my three classes tonight. If you know where, please tell me. Later.  ¶ 8:16 AM