Boy, do I have some Tales to Tell...
Sometimes you have to just say, "Damn the weather forecast. I'm making plans."
Hence the fact I was able to do so much fun stuff this weekend. Things like go antique shopping in Brooklyn after lunch at
CHARno. 4, shoe shopping with my mom after lunch at
Ramen Setagaya, and a picnic brunch in Central Park with family & friends.
Plus, the husband and I even went for a power walk after the picnic. Overall, a fantastic weekend with gorgeous weather. It even makes up for the fact that the next three days will be pouring rain. Oh well. You win some, you lose some. Later.
This has been a "heavy" week and I am glad it is over. Don't you hate it when about a million things happen and you feel like you have no time to take care of the ones that matter to you most? Well, that was the week. I am glad it is over.
Most of all, I am glad my computer is up and running again. Thanks to Janice for working her magic. We caught a phishing bug and could not get out of it. Thankfully, we were and our computer is working. And faster too.
I am glad the work week is over. I have gotten to a point where I no longer worry about work. It is what it is. I feel that leadership in any company is going to do what they want to do. And we have no say. So, you go in, do your work, go home, and lead the rest of your life. I refuse to make it a burden anymore. I hope some people I know learn how to do that. Because when you feel something is heavy and you can let it go, you'll be glad it's over. Later.
I think I have found something new. I think I may have fallen in love. So much so that I want to find a group who I can share it with all the time. I didn't expect to go to the Southwest and fall head over heels in love. But I did. So, I am going to let it happen. I have fallen in love with hiking.
The husband and I spent eight days in the Southwest. We saw Phoenix, the Grand Canyon, and St. George, Utah. It was in Utah were we both gave in to the feeling. We hiked every morning. Through washes. Up rock formation. Into caves. Through valleys. We took in the breath-taking views that one cannot describe. We breathed the clean air. We awed at the beauty that that area of the country has to offer. And we fell in love.
So, what does one do when a new love enters your life? You accept it wholeheartedly. You plan your next vacation around hiking. You look up hiking clubs to join in your area. You proudly display your dirt-caked hiking shoes which are not just used during rainy days in the City. And you vow to return to the beauty that is the Southwest. To a fantastic spa by a
Red Mountain. Because life is too short to not fall in love with something. Later.
It's really weird how one perceives themselves. Whether in accomplishments. Or in pictures. In pictures, it's easier to justify how good or poor you feel about yourself. It's always that blemish, that angle, the lighting, the whatever that makes you less than appealing. To yourself. I hate most pictures of myself. Once in a while, I'll see one that I like. It's never a portrait. I have portraits that I am fine with but overall, not really. Still, there they are. Representing me in Facebook.
In accomplishments, I think I feel worse. I can talk all day about how it all went well. And nothing I can do will change it. So, I live with it and am happy with the outcome. But am I really happy? Not really. Whether you believe it or not, you still try to live up to something that happened as a child. And to this day, as much as I try not to, I still am looking to find that lost point. That lost point that no amount of praise or thanks brings back.
So, what does one do? I don't know. I'll never be happy with how I perform. I'll rarely be happy about how I look in pictures. But I have to accept how I come across. And not worry too much. And not be too harsh on myself. And maybe, one day I'll be happy with both. Maybe. Later.
Is it symbolic or am I just spinning it that way?
My work week has not been the most fulfilling. It had this gritty feeling to it. So, as I booted my computer down, I decided to force myself to go to the gym to work it all off. For some weird reason, I got on the train and decided to head home. While on the train, I convinced myself to go for a power walk in the park. I thought the rain had passed and I was determined to spend some time outdoors rather than indoors surrounded by people.
I got into Central Park when a few drops began to appear. I thought, "I'm here. Just do it. It'll drizzle at most." About two minutes into my walk, it began to pour. I began to run for the part of the bridle path that had some tree coverage. I got there but I kept walking. A heavier rain began. I kept going. A quarter of the way through, it calmed down. I picked up my pace.
And that's when it happened. The sky's opened up. It wasn't stopping any moment soon. It was torrential. I was drenched. No tree coverage would help. I began to run. In the rain. It felt good. I felt cleansed. I felt the week being washed off me. It felt very cathartic.
Because, when you are soaked to the bone. When your sneakers are the total opposite of dry. When the music continues to blare in your ears. And you are alone on a running path. Nothing matters. There is a sense of cleansing. Everything feels washed away. Leaving a blank canvas of sorts. And you are free. To create you again.
I got home and stripped off my clothes. Checked to make sure my iPod was not destroyed. Stretched my legs. And got into a hot shower. It felt good to wash away the week. Something told me to go for a power walk in the park. It did a lot more than give me a cardio workout. It gave me a sense of new.
Is it symbolic or am I just spinning it that way? Later.
